When you think of the month of May, what comes to mind? Some people say, “May the fourth be with you” and think of Star Wars Day. Others might automatically say Cinco de Mayo, a Mexican holiday celebrating a victory over French invaders, and often celebrated with lots of tequila.
Very few people think about masturbation.
But hold on to your vibrators, because that’s what I’m here to talk about.
In case you didn’t know, May is National Masturbation Month (aka Masturbation May), dedicated to celebrating this incredibly powerful form of self-love and all other interpretations.
By the end of this blog, you’ll have a clearer understanding of the various forms of self-love, the role masturbation plays in all of this, and learn how to appreciate solo play without feeling gross.
What is Self-love?
I know it may seem pointless to include a definition of self-love, but bear with me. Just like every g-spot is different, no two people have the exact same definition of self-love, right?
Loosely defined, self-love is the ability to appreciate yourself. It’s a direct result of engaging in activities that positively support your growth. Over time, you develop a sense of personal happiness and well-being while putting an end to people-pleasing - which means you stop sacrificing your own prosperity for others. In the end, you learn to treat yourself with kindness, patience, and respect.
So, what are the different types of self-love?
Spiritual Self-love
Spiritual self-love is all about connecting with your inner self. If that means going to church, okay. If you’re the type to embrace religion, no problem. If you stray away from either of these but still remain spiritual, no judgment here.
The point is to eventually find peace within yourself day in and day out, regardless of what that looks like. In other words, you learn to accept who you are and your circumstances without criticism. Take it from someone who’s been there - this helps you become increasingly stable.
When it comes to masturbation, it’s REALLY hard to enjoy solo play if you’re at war with yourself.
Social Self-love
This form of self-love involves establishing healthy boundaries. When fully developed, you only want to be in relationships that respect your overall well-being.
At its core, social self-love revolves around communication. You need to know how to articulate your likes and dislikes, desires, turnoffs, pet peeves, etc., in order to create healthy boundaries. That way, your partner knows what you want without any room for miscommunication.
In my 5-day self love challenge, we explore how to develop effective communication skills in detail. You’ll learn how to resolve conflicts, get comfortable expressing your desires, and acquire new skills related to listening and feedback, all aimed at improving the way you feel about yourself and any relationship.
Mental Self-love
Mental self-love, also known as intellectual self-love, is all about valuing your thoughts. When you struggle with mental self-love, you engage in negative self-talk, ultimately doubting your self-worth and value.
That’s why it’s important to constantly seek out opportunities to gain knowledge and for personal growth. The more knowledge you obtain, the smarter you become. When you seek out personal growth opportunities, you broaden your horizons, becoming a more cultured, experienced person.
You know those people you meet whose life experiences sound like they belong in an Expedia commercial? They’ve traveled extensively, speak multiple languages, possess a high net worth, and have a vast, international network?
You could be one of them! But not without mental self-love.
Emotional Self-love
Emotional self-love means understanding the importance of compassion toward yourself. You know how to accept and embrace all of your feelings, ESPECIALLY the uncomfortable ones.
Like when it’s 2am on a random, pleasantly humid May evening. You find yourself suddenly jolted out of your slumber, keenly aware of how horny you are for no apparent reason.
Without hesitation, you think about masturbating. An internal battle wages where you weigh the pros and cons of pleasuring yourself, somewhat grossed out by what you consider your “animalistic impulses.”
After what feels like hours of indecision, you pass out unsatisfied. When you wake up the next morning, you’re somewhat on edge.
If this sounds like you, you aren’t alone.
Understanding the role emotional connection plays regarding self-love is a core component of my love yourself challenge. The better your understanding of your emotions, the easiest it is to accept all of them. In the course, we deep dive into building emotional intimacy, helping you connect more with yourself and any prospective partner.
Managing vulnerabilities related to emotional connection is also covered. No matter who you are, the more intimate a relationship becomes, the more difficult remaining authentic becomes. After all, you’re constantly reaching new levels of transparency! This section equips you with strategies to handle that amount of exposure.
After the module, you’ll foster heightened levels of acceptance, compassion, and kindness toward yourself. As an added bonus, it comes with daily emotional check-ins to improve your emotional awareness.
Physical Self-love
Physical self-love, also known as body love, means you appreciate your body and all its abilities. That can look like doing yoga, going on runs, lifting weights, or paying special attention to your grooming and self-care regimen. You have a strong desire to get the most out of your physique as possible.
It also means you accept all its imperfections. In other words, NO BODY SHAMING! If your joints sound like they could use a good coating of WD-40 when you sit down or stand up, you don’t condemn yourself.
And yes, physical self-love includes masturbation. What good would this section be if I didn’t mention that? I firmly believe in one’s right to engage in solo play and champion this throughout my work.
That’s why I devoted an entire portion of my 5-day self love course to exploring your sensuality. In this section, you embark on a guided self-exploration journey, uncovering new forms of pleasure while exploring your body in a loving way.
Interactive exercises help you uncover new ways to use your senses to heighten your pleasure levels. More importantly, you learn how to genuinely champion body positivity.
Final Thoughts
Self-love is about more than pleasuring yourself. Sure, that’s important, but it does no good if you can’t say you love yourself holistically.
Most people can’t because they don’t have a fully formed definition of what this means. They haven’t, for example, stopped to think about the spiritual or social aspects of self-love.
That’s what led me to develop my 5-day self love challenge - helping people learn how to love themselves and embrace their sexuality without judgment.
It’s high time we removed the stigmas related to masturbation and solo play. Fortunately, that’s what this month is all about.
Interested in solo play but don’t know where to start? I recommend beginning with this selection of premium sex toys. Regardless of which one you choose, you’re guaranteed to have your soul snatched.
Happy Masturbation May – I’m glad you came!